There was a man and a woman. In a lodge all alone ready to create a child. instead of having sex he violently punched her in the face and stabbed her in her armpits until her loud screams for help had stopped.

cats are pussies

Why didn't Suzie ride her bike? Suzie's mother aborded her. She was never born.

A priest, a rabbi and Santa walk into a bar. that's a highly coincidental situation.

What's worse than hitting your funny bone? Nothing

why couldn't jonny ride on a swing? he had no arms or legs why didn't jonny have any arms or legs? he's a potato!

If there are four gay men that come into a bar and need to sit down when all you have is one stool; what do you do? Get three more stools.

knock knock who's there jehovas witness... ...I allow them into my house for a cup of tea and a chat as I respect their religion

chuck norris was shot yesterday... tomorrow is the bullets funeral.

The body system was looking for a leader!? Heart - I am because I circulate the blood Brain - I should be because I control the body Liver - I should because I feed Anus - No, I am All laugh The anus held closed for seven days. The liver exploded the brain stewed and the heart stopped beating. Anus - Now, what am I?!

Roses are red Violets are blue If you are reading this Then it must be deja vu

Why did the boy drop his icecream cone? Because of the shock of seeing his dead family.

What do you get when you cross a man, with Alzheimers disease?

Knock knock. Who's there? Nobody is here, nobody would ever want to knock on the door of you. Yes, you. You reading these awful jokes.

What do you call someone who puts one number on here as a joke? Someone with no life.

Roses are red Violets are fine I'll be the 6 You be the 9

Your momma's so ugly, she has endure self-esteem issues relating to her appearance that have plagued her since grade school.

A jew walks in the german bar, the jew is captured tortured, raped, and shot along with his entire family

Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

Why did the clown's ballon animal pop? He was a victim in a drive by shooting.

What's black and breaks your stove when falling from a tree? Your stove

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't. Her head was stuck in the oven.

Roses are red, violets are blue, pee pee is yellow, poo poo is brown. if not you have a serious disease...

You know what they say... Big feet Lawn-mower

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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