give a man a blow job and he'll come for a second. teach a man to blow job and .... no that just doesn't work

What's worse than biting into an apple with a worm in it? Getting brutally raped by a giant transvestite donkey witch.

How does a man with no arms ride a bicycle? He can't, he loses control and falls over, getting a few scrapes and bruises.

Why didn't Pat's grandma go to his birthday party? Because she died last night

What do you call a cow that's holy? Holy Cow

What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

They don't call it Bangkok for nothing.

Roses are Verbotten Violets are Verbotten Anti-jokes is Verbotten Everything is Verbotten boats aren't Verbotten

How do you kill a blue elephant? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a white elephant? No there is no such thing as a white elephant gun. You take it's trunk, then strangle it until it turns blue. Then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

hey girl, My Gyarados is BIG enough for you to ride it ALL day and night

Did you hear about the young couple that confused K-Y jelly with window caulking? All their windows fell out.

Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He had no arms

A duck walks into a bar and the bartender--TOAST

If you spill milk Don't cry over it..... Clean it up.

what did the dog say when he walked in to a bar? Bark

What do you call a man that's very angry? A Very Angry Man.

Roses are green Violets are grey Tulips are a lighter grey I am colorblind.

Why are anti jokes so funny? Because their not.

What do you call a moldy apple? ... A moldy apple.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

Roses are cheap Violets are on sale It's Boxing Day Please buy my flowers I really need the cash.

What's black and white and red all over? The dead kitten on the road.

did you hear the one about the gay child molester?

Why Is Helen Keller such a bad driver? Because she is a woman

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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