Why was the man squinting his face for so long? He was constipated and couldn't give a shit.

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why do black people were white shirts?..they feel like it

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

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What is the most dangerous gull in the world? A gull with a machine gun!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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How do you kill a blonde? Repeatedly stab a knife into her jugular vein

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Q:why did the girl fall off the swing set? A:she had no arms

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What Do you Call Cheese that's not yours (nacho cheese?) *interrupt them violently and stare with crazy eyes!* STOLEN! I was gonna make quesadillas, now no quesadillas for anyone!

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Knock knock. Who's there? George Washington. George Washington who? George Washington Carver.

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A bass player walks past a bar. What? It could happen.

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Your momma so fat she can eat 10 of your 300lb friends.

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Why is ur cousin gay? because ya dad

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Q. If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what it will become? A. It will Wet or Sink, as simple as that.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was tomato...

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A man sees a hitchhiker on a road. The man crashes because he was not watching the road.

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A small plane is carrying three passengers: a young boy scout, a priest, and the smartest black man on earth. Due to improper planning, there are only three parachutes on the plane. The engines cut and the pilot takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The black man says, "I am the smartest black man in the world. I need to live." He takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The priest says to the boy scout, "Son, you take the last parachute. I have lived a full life." After a very touching moment, the boy scout puts on the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Minutes later, the priest dies a horrific death as the plane crashes into the desert.

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A man was chopping wood, he then brought the wood to his house and lit a fire.

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Your friend is so blonde that when she was born she had no hair but overtime it grew out and became blonde.

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What happened to the guy who ate the alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He died

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Your eye color is very unique.

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What happened to the power lifter that tried to deadlift 920 lbs while wearing nothing but his briefs? he succeeded because he is trained power lifter.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Knock knock whos there? me oh, cool... well come in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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