Itookasipasoda

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A man and a talking elephant in a waist coat go to a party. The party is actually an intervention for the man because he's on drugs and is ruing his life. The elephant is not real.

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yo momma's so stupid that she can't support your family, because she can't get a steady job, meaning she does not have money to pay the bills or buy food. This also means you must now get food from your local food bank and sleep on the streets.

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Know what's worse than being publicly embarrassed in front of your crush? Jeffrey dahmer

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3 guys walk into a bar to tell an anti joke. The bartender asks them to leave.

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Two muffins are in an oven. They turn out delicious.

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Whats massive, long, hard, cold, and is blue? A penis in an ice cube.

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My girlfriend never swallows; she has a rare esophageal disease that's potentially fatal.

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a man runs over his wife, who is at fault? -The man he shouldn't have been driving in the kitchen.

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck CAN chuck wood, that's why his a wood chuck.

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What's green and looks like a forest? A forest.

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What is the most dangerous gull in the world? A gull with a machine gun!

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A man gets into a joan Battle. He says Lamboguini Mercy your chick so thirsty then his pponent says Shut up Your chick is thirsty beacs yours face looks like a dried orange The man runs away Then the opponent realizes His Girlfrienn just aked Him for some water

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"Doctor, doctor! I think I've got Chlamydia!" "Yes, so you have told me. The urine sample you provided me with last week has come back positive. I'm sorry, sir, but you'll never be able to have children."

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What's worse then burning in hell for eternity? Well, a lot considering hell is a made-up place.

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Why did Dave buy a playstation? Because he wanted one.

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Knock knock. Who's there? George Washington. George Washington who? George Washington Carver.

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FUTURE-CHEESE!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

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What's worse than pushing a baby off a cliff?........ Standing at the bottom with a pitchfork....!

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Q. What did the man with no heart say? A. Nothing. No living creature can live without a heart.

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Three guys and 4 Catholics are in a bar. They guys are making a joke. The first one says I'm gonna go to Oregon there's no Catholics there and the second one says I'm gonna go to Ohio there is no Catholics there and the third one says I'm gonna go to Alaska there's no Catholics there and one of the Catholics walk up and say how about you go to hell theres no Catholics there.

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What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

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doctor, doctor, i feel sick the doctor runs some tests on his patient then comes to a conclusion then the doctor says " you are fine"

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Q:: when artificial intelligence takes over the planet, what will become of anti-joke.com? A:: idk, but my cousin's girlfriend and I will get naked together and she will get on top of me and tell me I'm awesome and that my d*ck feels really good inside her. you see by the time AI takes over, the means to create virtual reality experiences will be greatly enhanced.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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