A black guy, a jew, and an asian walk into a bar, have a beer each, and then leave, because they have high-paying jobs and don't want to risk getting DUIs.

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Sarah lost both arms in a car accident Knock knock Who's there? Not sarah. Roses are red Violets are blue Wow. Clever Knock knock Who's there? Still not Sarah, as she is in a serious condition at her local hospital, and so is fighting for her life.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it died. Q: Why did the dog fall out of the tree? A: Because it was tied to the monkey.

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What is Alqueida's favorite football team? The New York Jets.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, Dandelions are red, I lit your garden on fire.

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Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? They're really good at it

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A black guy and a Puerto Rican are in a car. Who's driving? Most likely one of the two, because if they were not that would be illegal.

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A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

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What day comes after Friday? Saturday, and Sunday comes afterwards.

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i like your face... HAHAHAHAH just kidding you make me want to projectile vomit.

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An anteatter walks into a bar, the bar tender says "hey renee zellweger"

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Q:why did i cross the road A: time to get a watch

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What sits in the corner of room and gets smaller and smaller? A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler

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Why does Chuck Norris own a can named Chuck Norris? because he is self-centered due to all the attention payed to him for virtually no reason at all.

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why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

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What is a jew in space? Dead

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What do elves get for Christmas? Overtime.

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What do you call a kid with down syndrome and no arms? Whatever his name is.

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Lil Wayne's song 6 foot 7 foot was named after my wewe

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What's black, white, and red all over? An African American and Caucasian man painting a house with red paint and accidentally spilling some on themselves

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Q: What Did Batman Say To Robin Before He Got In The Car? A: Get In The Car

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why did katy fall off her bike?

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Your mother is so fat, she is dying due to obesity and it would be utterly disgusting to make fun of anyone in that situation.

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I painted my dog to look like pizza. Someone ate him. It was my mom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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