What happens when an alien touches fire? It gets burnt

ARGH! LADY THAT SNAKE BIT MY PECKER! YOU HAVE TO SUCK THE POISON OUT NOW! OMG SURE, err...Meh, thats not a poisonous snake... Oh... dammit! I mean phew! Ouch ouch ouch!

How many black people does it take to screw In a lightbulb.....I can't see them.

Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11

What comes after 69? 70

Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

What did the robot say to the child? Nothing, he malfunctioned and strangled him. Despite the authorities best efforts to free the kid, he was still strangled because robots are really strong. After killing the boy, the robot self destructed and leveled 5 city blocks everyone within the vicinity was killed.

your mother is so fat that I am concerned that her health is at stake and she may develop diabetes and heart disease

Why was the baby crying? He saw a nigga

What do you call a man with leaves on his head? Steve, he's on camouflage training in the Army.

When Gronkowski spikes the ball, 20 children die.

hohifooncuiohicvsdhn ioshd

What did the rich man say to the poor man? i feel sorry for you

What's the difference between a bird and a wheel? They both fly, I lied about the wheel.

What do you give a black man for his Christmas? A gift that you feel would suit his personality so that he may draw enjoyment from said gift.

What did Billy say to Timmy? Timmy! I'm so sorry. *Sniffles* I didn't mean to throw the fork that hard. Rest in peace Timmy...

what's better than winning a gold metal at the special olympics? not being retarded.

Why did the boy eat the hedgehog? Because it made his mouth bleed,

Why is this the best day of 10 year old Johnny's life? His parents were killed in 9/11, and Osama Bin Laden has been found and killed. What, Too soon?

How about that airline food?

Why did the man crossed the busy road? Because he was sick of life.

What would Abraham Lincoln do if he were alive today? Scream and scratch at the lid of his coffin.

Why did the pot-head have red eyes? He got soap in them.

Roses are red Violets are blue You think this will rhyme But it's not gonna

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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