Did you hear the one about the kinky dominatrix? No. Damn. I really wanted the details.

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A man was chopping wood, he then brought the wood to his house and lit a fire.

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What did batman say to robin as he got out of the batmobile? robin, shut the door.

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What do you call a pencil made entirely of steel? I dont know, i dont name my pencils.

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What happened to the guy who ate the alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He died

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When life hands you lemons hand them back because you don't like lemons

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A hayride would be fun.

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Knock knock whos there? me oh, cool... well come in.

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Q. Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone? A. He got attacked by a dog.

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman gets off the bus and files a complaint with the public transit system and the driver loses his job.

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What did Shakespeare say to the software designer? Nothing.

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Why couldn't Spiderman pay his rent? He didn't have enough money.

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when two guys walk in somewhere late together you say. hay perv hay ert.

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Your mother is so fat.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Get in the van, or I'll kill you.

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A jew, a black man, a muslim, an atheist, a christian, a catholic, a roman, a russian, a cuban, an english man, a horse, a cow boy, a gay, a lesbian, a dancer, a teacher, a father, a mayor, a politician and a fish are in a bar. Now that's one crowded bar.

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What do you get when you cross a rhino and an elephant? Two angry pachyderms.

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If Dwayne the Rock Johnson was short who would he look like? Dwayne the Rock Johnson.

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Why did the plane crash into the mountain? Because it was being piloted by a loaf of bread.

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A Horse walks into a bar. So the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The Horse replies "My jockey raped me".

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knock knock whos there? a rapiest get in my van. ok, let me just get my purse

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Why do priest touch children? They are sexually deprived and frustrated because their religion forbids them from having a normal sexual relationship with the opposite sex.

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What is obama's favorite place to eat? Subway

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What's funnier than the Holocaust? Everything, because the Holocaust was a dark time. poop in the buttcheeks

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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