Q. You guys want to here a joke? Kids: Yeah! A. Women's rights

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A man went to his doctor and said, "Doctor, every time I hit my hand with a hammer, it hurts!" Then both him and his doctor died; so it didn't matter.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To cause global mayhem.

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What did the bank teller say after the man asked for a pen? Would you prefer black or blue?

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Q: Why was the cook put in jail. A: He has killed 2 people and robbed several stores

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How are a black man and a banana similar? They are both intelligent human beings, except for the banana.

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Oh, well if you want, I would like for you to tell her that I wish her good health, suddenly it sounds like I am speaking with spider man here, so you could balance on the top of a tower like a ninja and stuff?

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have PTSD. Time to kill myself.

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who is smarter than a human? a nerd

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How much weight can an ant carry up a mole hill? Ice cream has no bones.

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Q: Why did the man have sex with Amanda Seyfried? A: Are you kidding me?

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Damn Nero... So you are saying there is no hope left, the underground society is dead and buried.

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Why did the patient die of aids disorder? Butt sex. Lots and lots of butt sex.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Nothing.

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Q:Whats yellow and on the floor in the bathroom? A: A Rubber Ducky

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Kys

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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what's the difference between you and a yack one is a spitting idiot and the other one is a camel

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Why was the bartender's baby crying upstairs? Because it was being raped.

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What do you get when you cross a man, with Alzheimers disease?

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What did the depressed man get for his birthday? a rope

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Whats red and goes round and round? A baby in the garbage disposal

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops