What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a swimming pool? Determined.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot

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Why did Dom move to Wales? Because he is poor!

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knock knock who's there? penis in penis in who? penis in you

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A man walked into a bar. He has been in a coma for six weeks now.

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Guess who is violent. Osama

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what do you call one black man surrounded by ten white men.... A story teller

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"bus driver pressed the horn at my mum and she stuck a finger up at him " Not the first time she's got the horn and shoved a finger up

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Why was the deer afraid of the hunter because the smell of toasters

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What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

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Yo momma so normal, she got married, had three kids and then lived a dull but contented life.

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Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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Whats brown, sweet, and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Why does a man have a closet full of fruits? Because he has a mental illness and there is nothing to laugh about.

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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What do a rabbit and a plum have in common? -They're both purple except the rabbit.

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I don't drink. I'm not 21.

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Rose are brown, Violets are brown, Who keeps pooping in my garden?

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How do you confuse a blonde? Ask her a very challenging question.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I left my car keys inside.

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why didn't love legs cross the road because he had no balls

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What did Michelle Obama get for Christmas? Cancer

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What did the little orphan girl get for christmas? nothing her parents are dead

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A pig walks into a bar and says, "Oink."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops