Why didn't Michael Jackson celebrate his birthday? He's dead.

I saw a stray dog the other day So I petted it and got on my way.

Why do jews love money so much? Because money is very valuable and everyone loves it.

What's the difference between girl scouts and boy scouts? Girl scouts are usually females and boy scouts are usually males.

Mogok Papiti.

What do you call a prostitute with morals? Ironic.

What's worse than a baby on a pitchfork? Two babies on a pitchfork.

Q:What do you call a wizard who flies? A: A flying wizard.

My mom so fat, when she jumps gravity pushed her away from the ground

Why did the chicken cross the road? It's really irrelevant when you realize this joke is about a suicidal chicken...

Who found Anne Frank? The Nazis

What do you call a pig that just took a bath? Clean!

You wanna hear a joke? Me too

Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

anti-joke.ru - russian style

What did the man say when he saw a tornado coming his way? "Oh my god, that's a tornado. I better get out of its way so I don't get injured.

Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

why is my wife crying? because she doesn't like tomatoes

Why did the man die? He had a heart attack.

What do you call a man with only one eye? Half blind.

what do you get if you cross the mafia and the yakuza? a hefty bounty on your head

a man walks into a bar. it was a metal bar. his balls hurt.

What's long, hard, and has come in it? A long, hardcovered book.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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