Why do people carry around spoons? Because they like to do them

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A fish walks into a bar. He proceeds to talk the bartender. "Blub blub blub" The fish sitting next to him whispers to the bartender. "What is he talking about." The bartender shrugs.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why does Mario grown on shrooms? Because they bloom inside of him.

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What do you call a Man who likes little childeren A Nittany Lion.

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how do you save a black man ... u don't

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What happened to to dyslexic giraffe that tripped over a brick. It got back up.

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whats white and if it fell from a tree it would kill you ? Pat Butcher

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What did the dog get for Christmas? euthanization

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Dear Jim, I have a problem with my Hymen... "Jim'll fix it for you..."

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What do you call someone without legs or arms laying at your front door? Steve

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Hey did you see Helen Keller's dress? No, she's dead.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? The IRS.

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Yo momma so fat, when she went out side in a red dress, everyone yelled "HEY, KOOL-AID!"

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An itsy bitsy spider went up the water spout Down came my dick, and forced the spider out

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your mum

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What did the drug addict say to the doctor? I am a drug addict and am in need of help and rehabilitation.

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Asians look like they have down syndrome.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Charles. Charles who? It's your brother Charles. I came straight here from the doctor. I was just diagnosed with stage 4 testicular cancer.

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Hillary Clinton and 2 male aides were on a plane on a Friday evening which us not unusual for a secretary of state.

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Then none of us want to be right.

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Whats funny about a man in a pink leotard ? Nothing infact i think he's very brave

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What 10 inches long and wont be getting sucked this valentines day? Whitney Houstons crack pipe

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What's the difference between a rhinoceros? I DIDN'T MURDER MY BROTHER OKAY!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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