How many men does it take to change a light bulb? One.

Roses are red, violets are red, sunflowers are red, HOLY CRAP, MY GARDENS ON FIRE!

Why did Sidney drop her ice cream? A refrigerator fell on er

How are humans like slinkies? - They are not good for very much and bring a smile to your face when pushed down the stairs!

Haunnaka in 1940's Germany. six thousand people die. in one minute.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped.

what do kids take their lunch in to school. that depends if they buy lunch at school... otherwise they bring it in a lunchbox...

Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

What's worse than dropping an ice-cream cone? A dead baby. What's worse than a dead baby? Two dead babies. What's worse than two dead babies? The holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Dropping two ice-cream cones.

Mitt Romney's economic plan for America.

Why did the student shoot his teacher? Because he was super depressed and was just diagnosed with stage four brain cancer. And he was black.

What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile? " Hey Robin, get in the Batmobile."

My girlfriend told me "Give me twelve inches and make it hurt" I ejaculated prematurely and fell asleep.

Why couldnt Helen Keller drive? Because She was Blind you sexist asshole

whats long, orange, and comes out of brown stuff? -a carrot.

I pulled a disabled girl in the pub last night. The handle on her wheelchair was caught in my jacket.

why cant the porcupine marry the balloon? ...neither one can talk.. obviously.

An Englishman, a Frenchman, and a Viking are all fighting over a piece of land. The piece of land was the whole of England and this was the beginning of the Noman conquest in 1066.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs in water? Drowning

What did enzo give courtney for her 69th birthday? A cake that looked like a pussy cat named kyle

Yo' mama's so poor that she can't afford many of the privileges of everyday life.

I don't want to hear another joke about female hygiene, PERIOD! -Lets go Mets

so a horse walks into a bar and the bartender syas why the long face and the horse says naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

Why did Sandra fall of the swing? She had no arms... Knock Knock Who is there? Not Sandra

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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