When life gives you melons, your dyslexic

Where did suzie go for her Birthday? A van

S + B + B = SB fuckin' B

what happened when the chicken crossed the road? it got ran over by a car recently after it go killed it was eaten by a hobo and the hobo died from ring worm

Roses are *yanks hair* Violets are *yanks hair* *sobs and yanks hair* I have tricolomania

1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's There? *runs*

What's worse than having to watch your dad rape your mom? Having to watch your mom rape your dad.

Three men went out for a night on the town, one had too much to drink and was forced to take a cab home.

Yo mama so stupid that when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 twice instead

What do you call a kid with down syndrome and no arms? Whatever his name is.

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie!

that awkward moment when there is no candy in the van.....

What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? ProtestS from Anti GM activists.

What's wet and pink and fun to watch in someone's face? A big bubble gum bubble exploding into someone's face.

Knock Knock -Who's there? No one -Ok

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE I LIKE TITS TITS

Why did the man drown in the bath? He was a quadriplegic and couldn't support himself above the water.

25 kids go into the water. shark in the water. 10 come out. Ice cream man deals with the rest of 'em.

A man is on his way home from a business trip and walks into his house. He is quite as to not wake up his wife or kids. He gets to the bedroom to find his wife in bed with the neighbor. He is shocked at what he came home to and decides to file for divorce. She was a stay at home mom and loses everything because of the divorce. The man woke up from his horrible nightmare and kissed his wife on the cheek. She has always been faithful. He decides to tell her about the dream and, for insurance, emphasizes the part where she loses everything in the divorce. They happily live out the rest of their lives together.

A small plane is carrying three passengers: a young boy scout, a priest, and the smartest black man on earth. Due to improper planning, there are only three parachutes on the plane. The engines cut and the pilot takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The black man says, "I am the smartest black man in the world. I need to live." He takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The priest says to the boy scout, "Son, you take the last parachute. I have lived a full life." After a very touching moment, the boy scout puts on the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Minutes later, the priest dies a horrific death as the plane crashes into the desert.

Once upon of time, there was an ugly duckling. It was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, there are many theories as to why the aforementioned chicken crossed the aforementioned road. The most plausible is that the chicken was wandering around, when it came upon a road. Being a chicken, it did not know the dangers of crossing it, and proceeded to.

Why Tom is Gay ? Because brocoly didnt eat a mashroom .

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because I shot him. Why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? Because his tail was stapled to the other monkey.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...