What did the prison inmate get for Christmas? A warm chair to sit in

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Jamie Oliver eats a chip

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Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? John, your son. Now open the door.

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Whats the difference between 2 white men? They both have different jobs and one is racist orange peel.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple ? The Holacoast

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Why did the leaf fall off the tree? Because it was Fall.

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"What's wrong?" "I can't fap." "Why not?" "Because I saw your face."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To distract everyone from the Mexican.

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What's worse than being fat? Being gay

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What's bigger than a breadbox? Whitney Houston's coffin.

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Why don't pineapples grow on pine trees? Because they're tropical.

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How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One to drop it and die of gas poisoning.

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What did the facial stylist charge Jack Sparrow to get his ears pierced? A buc-an-ear!

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What's the difference between a blonde and a carrot? One's a human, the other's a vegetable.

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I'd like to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather did. Not screaming in terror like the rest of te people in his car.

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What did Hitler say to the black jew? Get to the back of the oven

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women's rights.

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how do you get an A in a class? idk never got on.

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teacher:humpty dumpty sat on a wall.... me: wait, why was he up there ms.park? teacher: well hes never been the same since vietnam, his wife divorced him and now hes a raging alcoholic.

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OMG FUCKING NERDS WITH NO LIFE CAN READ ABOUT THE POWER OF YOUR Vaginal puss puss color, no but seriously, I kinda prefer unshaven, I mean if I change my opinion I just do it myself or command that you shave yourself while I put it on my cellphone while I jack off to you, making a creampie, yeah because.

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why did the doctor go to jail? he was found guilty of the murder and rape of a 6 year old boy.

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A black guy and a white guy both interview for a job. The black guy gets the job because he is college educated and highly qualified.

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John: what is blue and goes blub blub Phil; I don't know, what? John: a blue blub blub. What is green and goes blub blub Phil; a green blub blub John: no green blub blubs don't exist, what are you stupid?

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops