What's Mackaulay Culkin's favorite salad dressing? Neverland Ranch.

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Say the line below all very fast to get sudden strange sensation... Magic-ish. I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... ...BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARK! Done? Now sit Down, have a little treat Good boy/girl! :Look well at the sun, the jagged Blackness will consume all, Your little star forever but a ever fading memory.

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What do you call a black priest? "Father" if you are Christian.

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Knock Knock Who's There Al Qaeda

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hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

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Whats worse than a worm in your apple? -slavery

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what do you get when you come across a old dog with herpes, a fat man with herpes and an apple? you get nothing but the satisfaction of seeing such a horrific sight

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Why can't Michael Jackson work at a boy scouts camp? Because he's dead.

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My name is Corey, and I am Dickbang Majestic. Q: Who is Dickbang Majestic? A: Corey is.

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Why did little Suzan fall of the swing? She has no arms. Knock,Knock Who's there? Not Suzan

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Why was the trash man feeling sad about his life? Because he had a mild case of depression to which his doctor recommended taking antidepressant pills.

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A deranged serial killer walks into a bar. No one leaves because he looks like a normal guy.

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Why did the cow hail a taxi? Because cows can't drive.

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Once soon a time there was a boy named steven. He dropped his ice cream because... You know the rest

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Roses are red.

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What's worse than eating poop for your whole life? Nothing really, you've got serious problems if you have another option...

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Roses are red Violets are blue Call the cops girl They can't unrape you

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Why did the Bruins win against the Flyers? ....they had goal tending.

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What did the horse say to the other horse? We are both horses

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In my eyes Nero, you are much like a philosopher, the kind which are mocked while they live, and then a couple thousands years later, are recognized as the most intelligent beings of their time.

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How do you stop a rhino from charging? An ak-47

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joke

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Q: Why did the clown fall off the swing? A: Because he was shot in the face

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Q: How did the woman die in the black neighborhood? A: She suffered a fatal heart attack while visiting one of her friends. Everyone mourned their loss.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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