What has 17 eyes, 43 toes, 11 feet and, 9 heads? A 17 eyed- 43 toed- 11 footed- 9 headed monster.

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A man stumbles into a bar and yells, "Let's get wa-" and falls to the floor dead. The forensic scientists preform an autopsy and find that after 15 years of achoholism and depression caused his heart to stop beating. His family may have mourned his loss, if he had not left them penniless after killing his wife.

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A bomb went off in japan where did sally go Everywhere

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There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. I shot him in the head. With a bullet made of lead. So now he's dead. No more eating of shoes.

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What's a black mans favorite thing to do Depends on that particular mans likes and interests

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Dick Cheney That's the joke

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What did the lactose intolerant boy say when he accidentally drank some milk? Nothing, he went into anaphylactic shock and couldn't breathe.

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Lightning strikes 2 year old baby.

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How do rocket scientists exchange greetings? They say "hi"

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What happened to the kid who brome his neck? He died.

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A duck walks into a bar and buys a drink. When the bartender comes up he says put it on my bill

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What do you call a puppy with all it's legs missing? Franklin, the quadraplegic puppy.

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why did the midget beat the basketball player in a foot race? the basketball player got bit by a scorpion and died within minutes.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue Wait Arent Violets purple?

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A man goes to a petting zoo. He sees a zookeeper wrestling a bear. The bear kills the zookeeper and escapes from it's cage. It promptly mauls the rest of the staff and visitors at the zoo until it is shot by local police.

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Do you know why Justin Bieber is so successful? Because he is a talented dancer-singer who was lucky enough to be discovered by pop music icon Usher.

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A horse walks into a bar. "Why the long face?" asks the bartender. "I'm a horse, it's genetic." replied the horse, confused at the bartender's infantile understanding of evolution and other species.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it looking for food for it was starving to death.

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An African-American is like a hammer. It can't be trusted in the hands of women.

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How many dead rats can you put in your ex-girlfriend's bed? 437.

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What did the leperchaun get at the bake sale? baked goods.

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If your riding your bicycle down the railroad tracks and your wings fall off how much icecrea does it take to fill a upside down doghouse

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What's black, white, and red all over? That could describe any number of objects.

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A man goes to a gas station to pump gas in his car. After about 7 minutes, he leaves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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