There was once a family of tomatoes. A daddy tomato a mommy tomato and a baby tomato. they decided one day to take a walk. but the baby was taking forever so the daddy tomato walked back STOMPED on him and yelled "CATCHUP"

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's redder than a red apple? 2 red apples

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why didn't Johnny ride his bike to school today? Because it is Saturday

thumb_up thumb_down +15

your momma's so fat that she weighs a lot

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A blond, a brunette, and a red head are stranded on an island. They all die of starvation.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A man walks into a bar. He is now passed out on the ground. (TD)

thumb_up thumb_down +15

a brick cheated on another brick, the brick that was cheated on was angry and became disgusted at the brick that cheated. the current brick that was cheated on tryied top kill the other bitch brick, the brick that cheated tried to break up the fight but testicles

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Their was once a man named Bob Clemens who really wanted to have sex with an underage girl. So one day he went on an online chat site to find one. He ran into this young girl and told her all the things he wanted to do to her and she told him that she had never done anything and really wanted to try it. Bob went over to her house one day and she told him to sit down and grab some cookies while she came back. She came back and Bob gave her the roughest pounding that any human being could recieve.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the jew kill himself? Because he had no foreskin.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did Valter fall of the swing? Because he didn't have any arms Knock knock Whos there? Not valter

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock Knock Who's there A girl scout want to buy some cookies to raise money for my cardiac surgery?

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the Chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was in a chicken pen.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's worse then failing a math test? Your mom getting shot

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Thats what she said

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call a guy with no arms? Names.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you do when your condom breaks during sexual intercourse? Get AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't cross it. He was pushed.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the chicken cross the road? No reason.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A Jew, a Catholic, and a Muslim walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What'll you have?" The Jew says, "I'll have a whiskey straight." The Catholic says, "I'll have a vodka tonic." The Muslim says, "I can't drink it's against my religion and I really shouldn't be here."

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Everything.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Once you go black, you have a high chance of being in an interracial relationship.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A Blond and a Brunette are falling down to their deaths, which one hits the ground first? Does it matter? They both die anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

when life gives you lemons you make lemonade when life gives you a homisidle brige you clearly have done something to make life angery

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the senator do after he typed he email? He clicked the send button.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops