Want to hear a scary story?' I was droppin a two ball and the monster walked in

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What's big, brown, and full of crap? A septic tank.

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What did the boy say before he died? I'm dying.

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what do you call a man with cheese on his face? cheese face

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was being chased by a coyote that hadn't eaten in several days.

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Q: Why was the mexican mowing the lawn? A: Because the grass was too tall

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what do you call a chicken thats little? a chicken. I lied about the little part

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what do you call a Palestinian with a large blade at the throat of an Israeli? a barber

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why did Sarah fall of the swing... she had no arms Knock Knock.... Whos there .... Not Sarah

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Your momma's so fat that when she looked in the mirror she broke down crying and threw up in the toilet because she is belemic.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if I had sex with your mother

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Why did the man fall of his bicycle? Because someone threw a fridge at him

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Whats the difference between a rabbit an a eagle? They both fly except for the rabbit

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Why doesnt snow like Asians? Snow is a form of precipitation within the Earth's atmosphere in the form of crystalline water ice, consisting of a multitude of snowflakes that fall from clouds. Since snow is composed of small ice particles, it is a granular material. It has an open and therefore soft structure, unless packed by external pressure. Snowflakes come in a variety of sizes and shapes. Types which fall in the form of a ball due to melting and refreezing, rather than a flake, are known as graupel, ice pellets or snow grains. Therefore since snow is unhuman they are then thus incapable of emotions because they lack any vitals organs.

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What happened at the 21 year old's birthday? She tried alcohol for the first time. She partied. She danced, She's dead. Open case.

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What do you call a person who walks but doesn't run? A power walker What do you call a person who runs but doesn't walk? Someone running to the nearest bathroom holding there crotch.

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Hey, I just met you And this is crazy This song doesn't rhyme PENIS

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Factors that can increase your risk of prostate cancer include: Older age Being black Family history of prostate cancer Obesity My friend's grandfather is black and obese, his 70th birthday is tomorrow and his dad died of prostate cancer

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why couldnt the polish people live in the outhouse? because the mexicans in the basement were too noisy

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Why cant your mom breathe She chockin on my D**K

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A chicken walks into McDonalds. He never comes out because he got grilled, greased, and seasoned.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Two men are making sandwiches, one man is spreading peanut butter over the bread and the other man is spreading honey and Italian raspberry jam over rye bread. the man with the peanut butter sandwich looks over and says "HEY, where did you get the rye bread?" and the man with the rye bread says "well my wife made it yesterday and I would be delighted if you come over for some tea, and tried some of my wife's homemade rye bread".

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A German, an Irishman, a Mexican and a Texan are flying together on an airplane over the ocean. When the plane begins to experience engine trouble, they find that there is only one parachute for the four of them! Through an amazing display of flying skill, however, the pilot is able to complete the flight and land safely.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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