A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde go on vacation in Hawaii. They plan to swim to the next island. The brunette and redhead do it with no problem. The blonde swims halfway and realizes she is tired. She continues to swim straight ahead knowing her friends are already at the next island.

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why can't timmy tie his shoes? Because timmy's an earth-worm

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The doctor said to the boy that a spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down. He is diabetic.

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Person 1: I got a really good knock, knock joke. Person 2: Okay. Person 1: You start. Person 2: Knock, knock. Person 1: Who's there? Person 2: ...

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A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. "Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?" The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?" The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch." A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money, I forgot what happens right but it wasn't that funny anyway

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why did sally fall off a swing she had no arms knock knock who's there not sally

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What is funnier than 24? If you think numbers are funny then you could have a mental illness and that isn't quite funny.

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead dive off a motorboat. They are sucked into the propeller and brutally disfigured instantly.

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A man walks into a bar, politely orders one drink, sips it while having social conversations with his peers, pays his tab, and goes to take the bus home. I can respect that.

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what did nena say in the library while her and her friends were on anti-jokes? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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What do mermaids wear? Nothing. Mermaids don't exist

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Kade was sad. He had finally got a girlfriend when he realized he actually liked men.

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Eeny meeny miny mo, Catch a tiger by it's toe, If he hollers let him go, Because if you don't he would attack you and go straight for you're neck and you would die a painful death...

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What did the potato say to the man It said nothing it is a potato

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Why was Mary's phone call suddenly disconnected? She was raped.

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What's worse than blowing out 1 lightbulb Blowing out 2 lightbulbs

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Why couldn't Danny learn the alphabet? Because a man of forty was staring at him in a very peculiar way and Danny found it very difficult to concentrate.

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Yo mama's so fat she got baptized in Sea World.

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So Helen Keller walks into a bar...

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Why did the black man go to Jail? He was visiting his friend!

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A casual web surfer logs onto a website and reads half a joke.

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Sex

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How can you tell if your wife is dead? The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.

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What is worst then 9/11? What? Tiger woods

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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