what do you call a woman who has sex for money? smart.

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What do you call a German who roasts Jews for a living? A comedian.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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B=boy G=girl B:hey i got a good nock nock joke but you have to start it G:okay nock nock B:whos there?

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Q: Why is six afraid of seven? A: Why??? Q: Idk, thats why I asked

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Why was Jimmy sad? Because he was about to be shot for attempting to assassinate the president.

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DILDO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Wuy are Kenyans so fast? Because due to variations in evolution, people from that part of the world have a better muscle build to run at higher speeds than equally trained athletes from other parts of the world.

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What's black and white and red all over? A racially integrated society.

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What do you do if you find blood in your poo? Stop stabbing yourself in the arse with a fork on wednesdays...

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what electronic vegetable sits in a chair? stephen hawking

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Porn

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Why do the lesbians where pants? Because they are extremely comfourtable and the best for cold days

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I once went to a Haitian party, yea.. The DJ really brought the house down.

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Yo mama is so fat, she needs to get serious about her diet, or else she might die of some sort of weight related issue.

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Skrillex.

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What's long, hard and full of seamen? A submarine.

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Why did the other Albino cross the road? He was running away from a witch doctor who was going to brutally murder him and steal his body parts.

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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Doctor, Doctor. I think I've broke my arm! I'm going to refer you to the fracture clinic.

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

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Jack and Jill ran up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and died.

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what do you call someone with one arm? Handicapped.

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your mom is so nasty that when she took a shower and acquired general etiquette, she became possibly more respectable

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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