A man walks in the a bar Now he has 3 missing teeth

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What's long, hard and full of seamen? A submarine.

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Yo mama is so fat, she needs to get serious about her diet, or else she might die of some sort of weight related issue.

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No just stuff on the internet when I get bored, like on facebook and stuff, why a nurse? Whats wrong? Is he ill?

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B=boy G=girl B:hey i got a good nock nock joke but you have to start it G:okay nock nock B:whos there?

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Q: Why is six afraid of seven? A: Why??? Q: Idk, thats why I asked

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Why was Jimmy sad? Because he was about to be shot for attempting to assassinate the president.

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What's black and white and red all over? A racially integrated society.

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what electronic vegetable sits in a chair? stephen hawking

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Why do the lesbians where pants? Because they are extremely comfourtable and the best for cold days

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What do you do if you find blood in your poo? Stop stabbing yourself in the arse with a fork on wednesdays...

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Porn

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what do you call a woman who has sex for money? smart.

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Wuy are Kenyans so fast? Because due to variations in evolution, people from that part of the world have a better muscle build to run at higher speeds than equally trained athletes from other parts of the world.

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What do you call a German who roasts Jews for a living? A comedian.

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Who lived in a pineapple under the sea?

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Chuck Norris is so strong, he can probably lift more than 80 pounds

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, Oh wait... I'm blind.

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"Hey baby, did it hurt when you fell from up there?" "Waaaaaaahhhhh..." "Ok, let me kiss it better."

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A man, a dog and a pregnant woman walked into a bar, the man bought a beer, the dog was put back outside as the pub didn't allow animals and the pregnant woman didn't buy anything alcoholic as she didn't want to risk the life of her unborn child-she had a soda.

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Yo momma so fat that when she sat on the bible jesus poped out.

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What's the hardest part of rollerblading? Telling your dad you're gay.

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what is green an invisible? this cabbage

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Coach: Hey, you missed the team meeting today, but I wanted to let you know we've had a number of changes to the lineup. Player: Really? Who's on first? Coach: That's right. A man with the unlikely name of Mr. Who is on first. We also have Mr. What on second, and Mr. I Don't Know is on third. The rest of the team is the same. Player: Oh. People have weird names now. But I'm sure they're great guys. Thanks for explaining that. Coach: Any time. Don't mention it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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