What do you call John Lennon without glasses? A skeleton, because John Lennon is dead.

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Bob: Your mama's so fat, she rolled over four quarters and made a dollar! Todd: YOur mama's so fat, here's a picture of her tied up in my basement. Todd wins the insult war.

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The body system was looking for a leader!? Heart - I am because I circulate the blood Brain - I should be because I control the body Liver - I should because I feed Anus - No, I am All laugh The anus held closed for seven days. The liver exploded the brain stewed and the heart stopped beating. Anus - Now, what am I?!

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What do you call a black man walking down the street? Danger Approaching

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Hai Patrick Hai Patrick

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How does Hitler tie his shoes? with little Nazis!

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A dog walks into a forest and sees a whale. The dog asks "aren't you supposed to be in the ocean?" The whale replies, "yes."

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A man carrying a bucket of golf clubs walks into a bar with a blonde, a brunette, and an asian. His name was Tiger Woods.

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What's greenish blue, smelly, and mushy? The fungus under my sink.

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Why did the blond get fired from her job at the M&M factory? Because she threw out all the M&M's with W's on them.

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How does a chubby baby eat his chili In a very chubby way with his hands smearing it all over is face

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a tiger swims into the indian ocen and eats a tuna. the tiger shortly dies

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whats the difference between a ladybug and a jew? there is none

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wat is osama bin ladin's favorite sport grenade catch

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knock knock who's there jehovas witness... ...I allow them into my house for a cup of tea and a chat as I respect their religion

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Why doesnt Squidward wear pants? Because he likes to hang loose

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A. Ask me if I am a tree B. Are you a tree? A. No idiot

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What did the man want for his birthday? Chicken dinner serves 2-3 people

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Red my dear, we are no exceptions.

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Why did Sam have no friends? He was dead.

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I'm typing this one handed... ... Because I'm an amputee.

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What happened when the president cut the hedge That is a highly improbable solution because he would probably have a body guard do it.

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What's green and eats rocks? A green rock eater What's purple and eats rocks? It hasn't been discovered by science yet...

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Q. What do you call a woman who, after 72 hours of hard labor, finally gives birth? A. Mom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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