Why couldn't the boy with no arms and no Legs swim? Because he was black.

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OMG I was sexting my friend and I accidentally sent my naked picture to my parents. What do I do? Tell your friend that you accidentally sent your naked picture to your parents.

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How many are in a baker's dozen? 12 bakers

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Where's a bad place to park your car? In a no-parking zone

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Ask me if I'm a rock. Are you a rock? No.

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How do you stop a black man from committing a crime? You throw him a basket ball.

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What is red and has wheels? Grass, I lied about it being red and having wheels.

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Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

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What did the Liver say to the Heart? Nothing, Organs can't talk

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A car walks into a bar.

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whats green and has wheels grass and i lied about the wheels

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Why was the boy sad? I don't know, what do think I am? An umbrella? Why would you even think FOR A MOMENT that it's OK to just ASK me random stuff? Do you have ANY IDEA who I am?! I'm your worst nightmare, and if you ever ask me ANYTHING without permission again, or so help me I will drown the nearest pet goldfish. P.S. His cat died.

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What's black and doesn't work? My blackberry

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An Englishman, A Scotsman, a Welshman, an Australian, An American, A German, A Swede, A Kiwi, An Austrian, A Belgian, A Frenchman, A Chinese Guy, An Indian, A Turk, A Czech, A Canadaian, A Russian, A serbian, A Portuguese, A brazilian, An Argentine and a South African go in to a bar. The Security stops them and says "I'm sorry i can't let you in without a thai"

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Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

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Justin Bieber

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Why do we have brown eggs? Because black people have sex with chickens

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How do you eat a sandwich With yo mouth bi tch

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How does a t-rex eat spaghetti? He didn't he ate a velocaraptor instead.

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Sometimes i like to paint myself red and then curl up into a ball and pretend i'm a tomato.

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Where are the first Cannibals in the Bible? A. 2 Corinthians 8:1

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Girl fight: Teachers take them to dq Boy fight: Lunch and recess in the library.

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hello there i am a male from the small town of balamory and i have just found a very large oblong with an acute right angle strongly attached to the left hand side........do you think i should hand it to the new york extra torestial services ?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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