whats do dinosaurs and people have in common? one of them is extinct.

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My wife came up to me and said, "I want you to make me scream with 2 fingers!" So I poked her in the eyes!

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Why did Elsa go into hiding. She died

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple ? Joseph Fritzl.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was stapled to a deer

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How long was the awkward silence it took to make Justin Bieber? Really long.

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Q: Why was the little girl cowering in a closet in a corner. A: Because there was a murderer/rapist in her house with her oarents gone.

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I was going to type an anti-joke but I totally forgot how it starts. It goes something like something something something something something your mom's a whore.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple ? Finding out your apple is rotten on top of that.

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Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a baby? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

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So, a boy walks into a baker's shop and asks for a loaf of bread. The man says "do you want white or brown?" The boy says "oh, I don't mind, I've got my bike outside."

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

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Q: what smells like cheese and tastes like cheese? A: cheese

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Nancy Kerrigan walks into a club

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Why did Sally drop her ice cream cone? Because she had no arms. Knock, Knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

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what Did The Cow Say To The Chicken, Moo

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"Why did Suzie fall off the swing?" "She had no arms." "What did Suzie get for Christmas?" "Cancer." "What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a tub of dead babies?" "I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage." "What did Suzie get for Christmas from me?" "My tub of dead babies."

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Why did the fish but the house Because it wanted to eat the house

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My name is Dave I like poems Microwave ummmmmmmmm (enter word that rhymes with poems)

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a penguin biked to a bakery he walked in and asked for buns the baker said how many 12 or 13 the penguin said it don't matter I brought my bike

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

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An Englishman walks into a bar.

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-What do you call a dog with no legs? -Call it whatever you want, it's not coming!

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a supermarket... They buy food, put in their cars, drive home and cook dinner.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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