Why would Jesse Ziegenbein and Terran Hansen make a good couple? Because they both smell like shit and are fat as hell

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Why did the man walk instead of taking the bus? Because he felt like getting a heathy workout.

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Q: What do you call a black woman who can't tell you who her baby daddy is? A: "Mam". Rape is a serious and painful crime, and the strength to raise a child on her own without her consent is worthy of respect.

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Why did the boy wipeout on his bike? An old man threw a snake in front of his tire

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Yo momma so fat she jumped up in the air and got stuck.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is both deaf and blind. Driving would be an extremely hazardous action for herself and other nearby drivers.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Hey, does this smell like chloroform to you?

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Roses are red,violets are blue, i love the colour red and green but its a pitty because im not so keen.

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Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

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What do you call a man sitting at the bar drinking alone? An alcoholic.

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Knock knock? Who's there? John. John who? John who is hospitalized in critical condition because he was struck by a ladder.

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Try this on your friends and make them look dumb So a plane crashes on the border between the USA and Canada. Where do you bury the survivors? You don't bury the survivors.

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Why did the stoner visit anti-joke.com? Because he was bored, and probably kinda high.

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Why are the dinosaurs extinct? A meteor hit the Yucatan Peninsula and caused a blast that covered the earth and killed them all.

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What do you call a full refrigerator? A freezer

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Why was the tree sad? Trees cannot think or move, and thus cannot feel emotions.

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a kid says, "where are you from?" other kid says "my mom"

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Why was the truck driver speeding down the road? To get to his mother's funeral. Why didn't the baby cross the road? Because it didn't have any guts.

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So a Buddhist said, "YOLO." ._.

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4 hours later.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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A Jew, black person, and Mexican jump out of a plane, which one falls first? Who cares they all died

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What do a pizza man and a gynecologist have in common? They are both hardworking members of the community!

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what did the robot say to the black guy? I'LL BE BACK

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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