Why didn't Lucas want to go down the slide? He was scared.

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Simba was moving slow,so I told him to MUFASA!!!

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What is yellow and smells like a flower? A yellow flower :)

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Justin Bieber.

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Yo mama so short, she developed a debilitating neck problem from having to look up at people when talking to them.

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How did the deaf girl die? I beeped but she didnt hear me

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Why was the boy put on his socks? So he wouldn't get blisters.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Orchids are white, Sunflowers are yellow

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Why did the girl stop running? Because she is in a wheelchair and will never walk again

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Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

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Why did the math student refuse to do his geometry homework? Straight lines do not exist, so there is no real world application to any geometric shape.

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Caroline Kelly...Tight Butthole

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What do you say to a black couple that just got married? Congratulations

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vote this down and i will DOX you

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Did you hear about the man hear about the man who lost an arm and a leg in a car accident? He's alright now.

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A gay man named pat played on a gay website with a child named Charlie

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The word you are looking for is charm, not seduction, I am above such things, and while I have no reason whatsoever to believe either one of us can gain anything from going "eye for an eye", I am sure I can offer whatever financial and even specialized assistance you might require in order to get that eye of yours seeing clearer than before... Worry not, I shall outlaw the name Nero and all the derivations and similarities from my Order, unless someone named Nero actually happens to come by of course...

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you put the chevy to the levy when your pants fell heave diarea

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What did the dwarf do after he sore a mole? Nothing. dwarfs are mythological creatures and therefore do not exist.

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What did one theoretical physicist say to another theoretical physicist? Hey there Bill, how's Nancy and the kids doing?

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How do you become a superhero? Eat 10 buckets of KFC.

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Why doesn't Susie have a bike? She has no arms. Who pushed Johnny off a cliff? Definitely not Susie.

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Uh Erron, you know, I do not spend most of the time before this computer or studying because I am popular nor anything, so that`s one thing, and yeah, I never done it with anybody so yeah, uhh lucky me or something.

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How do you stop the neighbors from calling the police when you play your music too loud? Kill them and use their bodies as noise insulation

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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