whats black dirty gross and sits on the porch all day? a trash bag

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What happened to the little boy who threw a spitball at the teacher? He was killed the next day when the teacher, who had a history of mental instability and schizophrenia, decided to go on a shooting rampage in class.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Knock Knock. Knock Knock Who? Knock Knock (:

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What do you get for the man that has everything already? Another one.

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A blonde, ginger, and brunette took the SAT. They all performed successfully and were admitted into their colleges of choice.

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Q. What do you call Lebron James on a roller Coster? A. A man who makes a lot of money and decided to take his family out on a family fun day to an amusement park.

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why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He had no guts

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why did the roof cave in? It was not structurally sound do to poor architecture

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When is a door not a door? Never.

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Why was the little boy sad? He was recently molested.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem about Red rosses and blue violets

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roses red violets blue my name chad i stupid

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Why did you cross the road. You didn't your looking at this joke

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nothing drews nose is f**ing hilarious

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how many licks did it take the boy to get to the center of a tootsie pop? he died of cancer

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Some people devote their to talking in their head. Jesus christ.

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What do you call a snooker cue that only hits stripes? Anything you want, it can't hear you.

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There are two kids playing basketball outside one kid shoots and makes it. The other youngster exclaims "nice shot!" because the other boy put the ball in the hoop from a very long distance.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are white Dandelions are yellow

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Presents

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Welcome to the anti-joke Olympics! As you can see ladies and gentlemen, our contestants are starting to look very excited as the "who can look the most bored" competition is just about to begin! We are terribly sorry to announce that as for the butterfly style contest, all of the butterflies drowned :( While at this corner, we can see these contestants have been waiting patiently for hours for the "who is the most impatient" contest to begin! While over here, none of our contestants have yet to make a chicken cross the road and tell them why! In the meantime watch as we mistreat these Jews in order to find out what is worse, the holocaust or a worm in your apple! So far our contestants with worms in their apples are complaining more, but dying significantly less, how will this end! How exciting! Finally our swing contest has been cancelled as Sally refuses to get on it! Moral: BUT WILL IT BLEND!

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Why did the Asian man open up a Sushi restaurant? Because he had a fetish for cumming in sushi and giving it to strangers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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