Man: Doctor, everything I touch hurts. Doctor: Okay. Let's test it out by first touching your leg. Man: It hurts. Doctor: What about your arm? Man: It hurts as much. Doctor: What about your back? Man: It still hurts. Doctor: I see......your fingers are broken.

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whats better then a pile of dead babies? 2 piles of dead babies

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Your momma's so fat, she has just been diagnosed with Chronic renal failure.

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The Oakland Raiders

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What did the Ethiopian get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Why couldn't Little Johnny read his 3rd grade novel? His was repeatedly stabbed in his eyes.

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a boy put a blanket oveer his head one night... He was warm for the rest of the night

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Why couldnt Jimmy ride a bike? refrigerator

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Roses are blue Violets are red I'm bad at poetry Potato

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Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

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It's not that hard to be Dyslexic. You just have to accept it nad ovem no.

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When life gives you lemons you mix them with vinegar to make a drink that will help your high blood pressure.

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What's your star sign? Cancer. Oh you're gonna die. AWKWARD.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree Peer pressure.

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Why was Jenny alone? Everyone else had died in a zombie apocalypse.

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What did the teacher say to the other teacher? We are both teachers. -Del Primm

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what did the man say to the other man? hey

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What happened to thepeanut who went to NYC? He was assulted

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a white men said to another white men that someone robbed a bank, it was at night and he wasn't wearing a mask, and also the camera couldn't see him, they now found out that he was black.

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What's worse than a teacher yelling at you? The holocaust

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Knock knock! Who's there? F*ck. F*ck who? F*ck you.

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What happened to the boy who ate a piece of his Halloween candy? He died. It was laced with cyanide.

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What is the biggest lie in the world How the **** should I know

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Q: What's worse than school? A:Your mum dying

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops