What do you get if you cross a canine and a sheep? A Sheepdog. What do you get if you cross a cat and a dog? You fucking stupid? It cant be done!

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What did the abortion clinic serve at the cafeteria? Fetus soup

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A mother is sitting with her son at the park. A nearby man suddenly breaks into uncontrollable coughing. The mother leans over to her son and whispers, 'Smoker's cough.' The son never takes up smoking.

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What walks like a duck, talks like a duck, and looks like a duck? Nothing. Ducks cannot speak, therefore this description negates all known living organisms.

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i think quinn is gay? you probably don't know him but when i walked him on him shoveling a ken doll is his butt

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Why was the boy sad? His parents died in a horrible accient earlier that day.

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Simon walks into a bar. He orders his favorite beer. The bartender says "Hey Simon, I see you're back with the usual, aye?" Simon says "Touch you tongue to your elbow." The bartender couldn't do it.

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Coldpaly is a good band

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dont be afraid of lard squeezing cause really its just me teasing

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Whats worse then any minority? The fact they still exist.

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Whats black on top and white on bottom? R a p e.

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Ask me if I'mm a candy cane. Shutup, there are a lot of these types of jokes. Create your own you poophead.

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What does have stripes, give milk and can fly? A zebra, a cow and an eagle.

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How do you wake up lady Gaga? You poke her face

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How do you milk a cow? Pull on its' utters.

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Why is this the best day of 10 year old Johnny's life? His parents were killed in 9/11, and Osama Bin Laden has been found and killed. What, Too soon?

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Trust me, you are that kind of girl, and no, you are not nerdy, you are open and down to ground, while your beautiful exterior means a lot to me (I am a man, its the way I am), I would never have wanted to talk to you or even less visit you with a pack (make it five packs) of condoms, if you where the awkward Asperger kind of gal, so how old are you, like seriously?

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Q: What did the serial rapist say to his best friend? A: You're a good friend

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How do you throw a party in space? You planet!

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whats the best joke ever? womens rights

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Q: What is red and green and goes 100/mph? A: A frog in a blender

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A mormon walks into a bar.

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What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

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Roses are red Violets are blue classic

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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