What does a tomato and a human have in common? They both spray red liquid when stabbed repeatedly

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Your momma is so fat that she could benefit from loosing a couple of pounds.

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who is not good looking? mon morello

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

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A bear walks into a bar, and says "I'd like a gin... and tonic." The bartender says "AAAAHHH! A BEAR!!!" and calls animal control. Later after the beast has been tranquilized and carted away, he rationalizes having heard the bear speak as trauma-induced hallucination.

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a man walks into a bar and buys a drink

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Why did the women die? Because She was a Squirrel.

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What do you call a person with disabilities? Names.

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What did the man say to the other man? I have a large rod

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The Awkward moment when the world doesn't end

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What is Rebecca Blacks favorite resurant? T.G.I Fridays...

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Whats the difference between a black guy and a bucket of shit? A black man is a life form, more specifically a homosapian, while the bucket, as well as the shit, is an inanimate object.

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ccjcjcjcjcjcjjcjcjcjjcjcjcjcjcjcjccjcjcj why

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— Knock knock. — Who's there? — Funny. — Funny who? — A funny joke.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Joe Bereta is a member of al Qaeda.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She doesn't have arms. Knock, knock, Who's there? Not Sarah.

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Knock knock ... Guess they aren't home.

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken so he could fry it.

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Yes or No? You're wrong because it was both.

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a duck walks onto a basketball court during a game. The referee sees the bird and blows his whistle crying fowl just as the player was running up to dunk. The confused bird flies away and the referee gets punched by the angry player.

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Your dad is so hairy, that he shaves to look more cleanly.

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i am iron man running over fat kids in my van

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What do you call a black man who flys an airplane? A Pilot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops