What's the difference between a dead black man in the road, and a dead dog in the road? One is a human being that probably leaves behind family and friends that will miss his absence. The other is an animal that will also be missed, but to a lesser degree since dogs don't form a bond with people other than the family it shared its life with. In either of the two cases, if I witnessed the accident that caused the death, I would promptly notify the authorities so as to make sure that the driver of the vehicle that hit them would be subjected to a breathalyzer test.

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Two kids walk into a bar and get arrested for underage drinking.

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That awkward moment when you have to tell your child you wanted an abortion, and still wish you had.

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two hippo's were in the lake. The water was up to their eyes. What did one hippo say to the other? I don't know why but i keep thinking it's tuesday.

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An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

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Why couldn't the bunny hop? Because it lost both it's legs

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what did steven hawking say to the prostitute? Nothing, he is unable to speak, he needs help from his word speaker thing.

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Why was the Africanan boy hungry? Because food is hard to come by in Africa.

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How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

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A horse walks into a bar and begins to moo. Everyone is confused until it takes off its costume and reveals it's just a cow.

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boling water: why is it taking so long for you to get hard? egg: sorry, it's just because i recently got laid by a chick.

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shit is shit, even if you paint it purple; its still shit

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Yo mama is so fat when she went to the fat contest they said SORRY no pros alowed

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What do Jerry Sandusky and Michael Jackson have in common? They both had sex with little boys.

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why did Michael Jackson cross the road? He didnt he is dead.

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You're American when you enter the the bathroom and you're American when you exit the bathroom. What are you while you're inside the bathroom? Using the bathroom.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Eating the worm

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What's is the worst thing america has done? Jersey Shore, We mad those idiots rich.

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A man who was not blind, but could not see, walks around a metal bar, and proceeds to the bar, where he walks into the door without opening it first

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Hello.

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Call of Duty Infinite Warfare

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Before you sneeze Say PIK-Achoo

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How do you get four gay men on one stool? You get three more stools.

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Q why did the girl scream A she got hit with an axe

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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