roses are red violets are too im bleeding

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How do prevent a black man from robbing your house? Lock you doors and perhaps get an up-to-date security system.

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Knock knock Who's there? Mike Mike who? Mike Davis from across the street. Come in.

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What did the man before he was executed? Nothing. He was already executed before he said something.

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Q.Whats the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? A. I don't were my cleats on my trampoline.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow You were probably expecting a poem or something but no this is just a gardening fact

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A three-legged prostitute, a coal miner, and R. Kelly walk into an all-midget rendition of Stravinsky's Rite of Spring. The miner has a heart attack and dies. The concubine and the vocalist do nothing to help.

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Romeo and Juliet both die at the end of the book. HAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAAHA i just screwed you guys over.

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What did the cripple wish for when he saw the shooting star? A toothbrush.

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What is a name of a kid with down syndrome. Adam Hebeison

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What do you get when you put Star Wars and Disney together? A Bad Sequel

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What comes after 69? 70

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A Christian and an atheist are in a bar. Neither one knows the other's religion and they continue to drink.

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What did one volcano say to the other? Nothing. Volcanoes are inanimate objects that do not possess the ability to speak.

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Why did the gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chickens foot.

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An English man, Irish man and a Scotsman walk into a bar. And have a wonderful evening of multicultural entertainment and fun together.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know you have to ask the chicken if you speak chicken

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What do gay horses eat? Horse dick.

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What's the difference between the WNBA and the NBA? The WNBA features female athletes, as oppose to the males of the NBA.

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What's the difference between sand and menstral blood? I can't gargle sand

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What did the Nazi Death Camp Guard say to the escaping prisoner? - Nothing. He shot him in his face.

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What did the... Uh, I forgot the rest of the joke.

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A construction worker walks into a bar. Lucky he was wearing his hard hat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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