A blond and his wife were in the hospital expecting their first child together. The wife gives birth to twins and the husband turns to her and says, "I can't believe we had twins. I'm so happy!"

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? were lawyers

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Today, my house burned to the ground. FML.

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Why did the atheist start snoring in his sleep? He has a naturally small airway and fairly large tonsils.

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so a guy walks into a bar, he says nothing for he now has a concusion

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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? one, hes an electrician

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why couldn't sarah ride the bike? She had cerebral Palsy

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What did the German say to the Jew? Welcome to Germany we hope you enjoy your stay

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- What would you say if you'll see a Mexican eating hamburger in fast-food restaurant? - Enjoy your meal.

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What do you call it when a dead man has his wallet stolen? Rob Zombie.

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Where did Little Johnny go when the bomb hit? Everywhere.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your mother. Please open the door. Your mother who? You were adopted.

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Why did george washington not make it to the prom? because george washington is dead

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why did the chicken cross the road? who cares?

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Once upon a time, there were a lot of Jews......

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Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: A sad, unfortunate dog.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? It depends on their painting skills.

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What's the difference between a dead black man in the road, and a dead dog in the road? One is a human being that probably leaves behind family and friends that will miss his absence. The other is an animal that will also be missed, but to a lesser degree since dogs don't form a bond with people other than the family it shared its life with. In either of the two cases, if I witnessed the accident that caused the death, I would promptly notify the authorities so as to make sure that the driver of the vehicle that hit them would be subjected to a breathalyzer test.

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Q)why couldn't the baby talk? A)the baby was dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

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Can a man reproduce with only one testicle? No because girls don't dig that sh*t

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911 jokes are just plane wrong

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What do Native Indians and Asian Indians have in common? They're both human.

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alert("Hello");

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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