How many dollies does little Suzie have? Enough to kill 15 men

What did farmer brown say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

How do you stop a baby from crying? Slit its throat

Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent gets brutally murdered.

my whole life!

What's the difference between heaven and hell? Hell likes you more.

A man walks into a bar, the other man ducks.

thomas the train walked up to an old man and said nothing. mostly because trains cant walk, and they cant talk.

why did the chicken cross the road? because there were no cars coming and it seemed like a safe time to cross

Why did the Mexican man jump to the floor? He had a stroke.

Why did the black man go to the back of the bus? The only unoccupied seats were back there.

There are a fox and a chicken and the fox eats the chicken.

What happened to the kid who brome his neck? He died.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer Roses are red

Whats the difference between a squirrel and a grape? They're both squirrels but ones a grap...

Why did the man leave anti-joke.com? Because he realized that it was time for dinner and the ham was burning.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to my house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

It is better to have loved and lost, Than to have fallen, bleeding, into shark-infested waters.

what did the kid with no legs gat for her birthday? A soccer ball! I feel bad for this young girl.

Knock Knock Who's There Lettuce Lettuce who? Lettuce down the street building his new garage

The truth is he loves her!!

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?' The horse say " i have testicular cancer."

A man walks into a bar. Because he's had a rough day, he asks the barender for a drink. Then another... Then another... (continued) The man walks out of the bar and goes to his car. He starts to drive back to his house. He wobbly makes turns and closes his eyes every 5 seconds or so. He also talks to his boss on his phone for the majority of the ride. Surprisingly enough, he makes it home safely and doesn't harm anyone else despite the large amount he had to drink. He stumbles into his apartment and goes up to his room. He slumps down onto his bed on his back very heavily, causing the room to shake a bit. He opens his eyes, only to find his glass shandelier falling from directly above his face. His body was found by his girlfriend the next morning. I guess there's no real moral to the story then... Maybe it's: You can drink and drive, but don't put a shandelier directly above your bed... I guess? Wow. What are the odds?

A man was driving and texting at the same time and when he was not looking a car passed him on the other side of the road. The man driving the car that passed the man was talking on the phone. When the man txting looked up and look back and said thank god thats not me talking i could of crashed if i was him

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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