why did Helen Keller's dog commit suicide? you would too if your name was uuhuhuhduhh

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootise pop? No, seriously, does anyone know?

What did the commentor say when he saw the "waht's worse than finding a worm in your apple...the holocaust." joke? I am offended to your cruel referance to worms.

What's worse then getting a broken bone? A large marsupial charging at you with vicious speed

what did the chinese man say to the other asian? he said ??????

XD A COZY FIGHT XD WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT? I am gonna kick your ass, break your face and then give you a kiss on the cheek as your mangled corpse bleeds out... XD :)) THANKS FOR THE LAUGHTER XD XD Reminds me of a former comment where you describe the local weather, you know, we do not live that far away from each other, hell it was actually the time, we are completely in the same timezone, so anyway, do you also get cartoon network on your television?

How many pianos does it take to change a lightbulb? Two. One to change the lightbulb, and one to play a motivational tune.

Why did the little girl cry? The little girl cried for mercy as her attackers violated every inch of her innocent body, tearing her up from the inside until her organs were forced out of her anus and blood squirted from her ears as the pressure inside her body exceeded to a maximum. After the attackers were done with the corpse, they cut off her limbs and stapled them to her head.They placed her now decomposing body on the front porch of the worried parents' house and rang the doorbell.

Whats the most fun thing you can do with hangers and a vaccum cleaner? -abort babies

Have you seen Hellen Keller's treehouse? No. It's quite nice, her father made it himself.

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

Smoke weed till i die nigga

Knock Knock Who's There Me

what do you call a cow with no legs? ground BEEF!!!!

1d

k

Your momma so fat.... She's at risk of cardiovascular disease. You should take her to a nutritionist.

You are basically asking if I care for you, care for me, and if this could put us both in risk... There is no picking at this stage, why would I use you?

Why do fat people make such good slaves? They're too fat and lazy to escape. Unfortunately, if you want your slave to be fat, you actually have to feed it properly.

What is 100(1+1) -100 + 50 x2 - 300? 0. But who cares? The answer is as worthless as you.

Why did the Billy flunk the test? His parents were killed in a refridgerator

why did the chicken cross the road? becuase he needed to get to the other side and he was using a crosswalk

Why are Chinese women such bad drivers? Only company executives are fortunate enough to own cars in communist China. Furthermore, women are still in a subordinate class in many Eastern societies.

How do you catch a unique animal? You get professional hunters to catch the animal.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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