How many dead babies does it take to fill a bathtub? 17.

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Q. whats the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? A. I dont jump on my trampoline with metal cleats.

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Steve is getting paid $29.50 to bounce a ball Steve is getting fired monday

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what is orange and sounds like a parrot a carrot

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A bar walking into a mans house, then the blonde says stupid words like why did the chicken of the sea cross the road and pigeons go moo moo like a cow.

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How do you kill Lady Gaga? There is no point in trying, she is too heavily guarded.

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What do you get when you cross a rabbit and a pair of scissors? Nothing. That's not possible with current technology.

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whats the diffrents beetween a footballer and a hat nothing i lke chesse

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Roses are reds violets are blue when your parents says your beautiful they're lying to you

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What do u call old black people in a shed? antique farm equiptment

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody because a pineapple is not a proper home

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My title of old was Satan. You humans killed my brother, ending God the holy trinity`s stay on earth, the Gods Omega. Moral: And yet you call ME? THE ANTICHRIST?!? I OFFERED HIM WATER! YOU OFFERED HIM TORTURE AND DEATH!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have to go to the bathroom.

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Why did the Christian man dislike gays? Because Christianity views being gay as a sin, and as a follower of the religion he decided he did not like gays.

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What did the newborn get on it's birthday? A life

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What do a Siamese cat and a birch tree have in common? Both exist.

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knock knock. Who is there? You have. You have who? Your entire family in my basement.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him.

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a charmander decided to take a swim a.w. j.p.

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Why did the garbage man cross the road? He was doing his job.

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So a guy goes to his doctor because he thinks he has an STD. He asks the doctor "how bad is it doc?" to which the doctor replies "Well, I got the test results and it doesn't look good. You've got chlamydia, gonorrhea, and onomatopoeia. The guy asks "What's onomatopoeia?" The doctor replies "It's exactly what it sounds like"

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Why did the blonde make pasta even though she had a gluten allergy? She had some Italian friends coming over. Also she bought some gluten-free pasta and sauce so she wouldn't need to be hospitalized.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face"? The horse does not respond, because it is a horse and lacks any cognitive ability to speak or understand English. Instead, it becomes confused by its surroundings, takes a dump on the floor, and gallops out of the bar knocking a few tables over in the process.

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Your at your local street corner and find a woman, the fact that she has balls dose not stop you from inviting her into your car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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