Why couldn't John ride a bicycle? Because he is a fish.

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When life gives you limes....... first you have some problem and second u throw them at people

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what did the African kid get for his birthday AIDS

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Knock Knock The homeowner's acquaintance had called him just minutes prior because he had forgotten something at his house. With this having occurred, the homeowner had a strong sense of who was at the door. Being a cautious person however, he checked his prediction by examining the man through the door's peephole. Having asserted that it was what he had in mind, the homeowner opened the door and handed him some papers that were of importance to the acquaintance.

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What do Abraham Lincoln and George Washington have in common? They both had beards, except for Washington.

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Why'd the squrille fall out of the Tree? Cause it was dead

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Knock knock. Who is there? The FBI. They have a warrant for your arrest.

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Why didn't the boy get his mom anything for her birthday? He was killed by a drunk driver years ago

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Daniel is a fag

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Christianity.

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Why do black people have nightmares? Because we killed the only one with a dream.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Inform her that she is an illegitimate child resulting from a vicious, torturous rape and that her mother will never truly love her.

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Why couldn't the black man get his lawnmower to start? He was too poor to own a home =)

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's DEAD!

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Yo mama's so fat, she weighs over 400 pounds.

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How do you turn a piece of meat into a vegetable Break her neck

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What do you call a Puerto Rican, a Blonde, and an African woman in a taxi cab? Three people who happen to be traveling to the same location at the same point in time.

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Have you heard the one about Tony Hawk's brother Mike? Neither has he, considering Tony Hawk only has a brother named Steve.

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Why did the black guy get a boner? The nitric oxide levels in his trabecular arteries and smooth muscle of his penis rose, causing his arteries to dilate and therefore enlarging his penis.

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How many Alzheimer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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What do you do if there's a black guy bleeding on your lawn? Help Him

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A boy owned a dog that was uncommonly shaggy. Many people remarked upon its considerable shagginess. When the boy learned that there are contests for shaggy dogs, he entered his dog. The dog won first prize for shagginess in both the local and the regional competitions. The boy entered the dog in ever-larger contests, until finally he entered it in the world championship for shaggy dogs. But the day before the championship the dog died.

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What Happens when you shoot a deer? It's Dead

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Knock knock. Who's there? Falafel. Falafel who? I falafel. You feel awful? Ha, ha, ha! Oh, what a kneeslapper! Oh, God! Thanks for the laugh, I was feeling a little down and I... No, I just meant I ate a falafel. Oh. Yeah.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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