A man walks into a bar, he sits down.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What smells like bananas but is invisible? Monkey farts

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzhiemers Wait, who are you

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Ebola, You're going to die.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

I thought we where okay, you seemed so nice and calm before, are you okay? What happened?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's worse than eating poop for your whole life? Nothing really, you've got serious problems if you have another option...

thumb_up thumb_down +7

White men's rights

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why is my lawn red? Because i forgot to tell my neighbor's children to move

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the pretty young girl get for her birthday? Cake and presents (get your mind out of the gutter).

thumb_up thumb_down +7

When Chuck Norris is in a puddle, he doesnt get wet....he wears rainboots.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q. What did the Cat say to the Dog? A. "These humans are so jobless.."

thumb_up thumb_down +7

you will like this because i am black.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A dyslexic man walks into a bra

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the man die? Supercalifragilisticexpialidosious

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why was the black kid in the AP Calculus classroom? Because he was a very driven student, who studied hard so that he could attend a good University and build a good life for himself and his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why would you kill a black man? Well, murderers have different motives, the most common of these are revenge or a psychological illness.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How many Pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1. and "pollack" is a derogatory term that could be fond offensive to some people.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What happened when the man got into the taxi? The driver shot him 17 times in the chest and ran away

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How did Bob survive the plane crash? He didn't

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Doctor: “Knock Knock” Patient: “Who's there?” Doctor: “The interrupting Doctor” Patient: “The inter- Doctor: You have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did john have to have back surgery He needed his back "screwed" up

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops