Pacient: Doctor Doctor i think im becoming a vegetable... because of my heriditory bone marrow mutation

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Tucker Rivera

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Women's professional sports

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The $5.00 Foot-long at Subway's is actually $5.45 due to tax.

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What's red and weighs a metric ton? An apple, my scale wasn't calibrated

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There are two bears in a shower. One bear says "pass the soap." the other bear says "no soap. Radio."

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Why did the man die? He had a terrible form of flesh-eating bacteria and he suffered a lot of pain.

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What is better than getting a job? Getting a better job.

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A man is walking in a bar and then leaves once he gets his drink

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Yo momma so fat, she was recently diagnosed with type 2 diabetes and is at great risk for developing heart disease!

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what do you call a door made of steel? a steel door

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Knock knock who's there? Boo. Boo who? Uh, Boo Johnson, your next door neighbor. Forget it I'll come another day.

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united we sit, cause we're fat

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Door! He then broke down into tears as the nightmares from his schizophrenia had lead to a severely crippled mental state.

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Your mother's so fat that when she goes through rotating doors, the doors rotate around her.

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Why couldn't the T-Rex give anyone a high five? Cuz he's dead.

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What did the girl say to the boy? You are a boy.

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Q: why are black people good at basketball A: god you racist bastard

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How do you stop someone from getting cancer? Kill them.

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If your yacht is if moving at 50 knots per hour in a wind tunnel how many leprechauns can you fit in a chamber? Even, because purple is attracted to bestiality.

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Knock, Knock.. Whose there? Its the Census Man!!

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A guy walks into a bar with a Donkey and a jar full of pennies. He walks up to the bartender and orders ten shots of whiskey. He was found dead the next morning from erotic asphyxiation.

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How do you make a sausage roll? Wrap some sausage meat in a pastry dough made of plain flour, water, salt and fat, and bake it in an oven.

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? To get his chemotherapy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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