Why didn't the cat eat its dinner? Because I nailed its head to the floor.

Roses are red. Waffles are blue. Blue Waffle.

What would you call the baby of an elephant and a rhinoceros? Nothing. They are two entirely different species and therefore cannot breed.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Recycling anti-jokes

Roses are brown, Violets are brown, WHO THE HELL $#!T IN MY GARDEN?!

Whats's the similarities between an apple and a cat? They both have legs except for the apple.

NO IT IS MINE! ALL MINE!

Why was the man wearing all white? He was a part of the Ku Klux Kan.

why did the chicken cross the road it didnt

What do you do when your condom breaks during sexual intercourse? Get AIDS.

how does hitler drink soup ? with a spoon

What do you get when you cross a dog with an anteater? An animal unlikely to survive beyond infancy.

Why can't Scrillex fish? Because He is too busy to practice fishing.

Ask me for £1000 Can I have £1000 No get a job

Why did the bartender refuse to let the black man in ? Because the bar was about to close.

How do you kill a blonde? Tell her she can breath underwater.

i got 99 problems.... and aids is one

Why did little Suzan fall of the swing? She has no arms. Knock,Knock Who's there? Not Suzan

Jesus walks into a bar, the bartender shoot the zombie

What did lil' Bobby get for christmas? Cancer.

Q: What do you call a blonde, a brunette, and a red head all who are 16 years old and standing in a school? A: High School Students

Q:why did i cross the road A: time to get a watch

chuck norris does not know how to use a plunger.

what's hotter than my cousin's girlfriend? I don't know. she's remarkably hot. like, one of the hottest people I personally know.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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