Q. What do you call a headless boy in a river A. A headless boy, in a river.

Two chemist walk into a bar. The Bartender ask them what they want. The first chemist says he wants H20. The second chemist laughs and says he wants H20 too. Then he dies.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced to against his will by a group of marauding ninjas who happened to be strolling by at the time.

Got Milk? Why yes! Yes I do!

What are the differences between a black man and a park bench? One's a chair and ones a person.

How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

"Sticks and stones" the man said and shat on three different complex turtles

Roses are blue Violets are red I got this backwards Carpets are nice

Find x X + 2 = 5 ^ I found it

Why do eggs come in 12? because 13 is bad luck

A Jew, an atheist, and an Asian man walk into a bar. They all have a drink and then go home to their families

Q: y does obama keep raising gas prices A: he dosent want anyone to be able to drive to the poles in november

Q: What is better than Vagina? A: Nothing

What happend to the man who walked into a forrest? He got raped by a giant vicious mutant spider

What do apples and black men both have in common? They are both people except for the apple

A guy walks into a bar. He has a couple beers, gets in his car and goes home. He got arrested on the way because it is illegal to drink and drive.

Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M Factory Because she repeatedly wrote Ws

One day a boy asks his teacher what blue velvet is then the teacher says "we don't ask questions like that in my class go to principal's office now"so the boy goes to the principal's office and then the boy asks "what is blue velvet"then the principal says"no one says that in my school get out" so the boy goes home and asks his mom what is blue velvet then his mom says you don't say stuff like that in my house get out!so the boy see's the Mayer. So the boy asks the Mayer what blue velvet is then the Mayer says no one says that in my town get out of my town! So the boy see's a man and the boy goes to the man and the man asks what happend to you and the boy says well I got kicked out of school kicked out of my house and got thrown out of town just because i asked what blue velvet is! So the man tells the boy that there is a lady across the street. So the boy is in the road and then the boy gets ran over and dies. So the lesson here is look both ways before crossing a street

Dont follow this link.......http://www.google.com/imghp?hl=en&q=blue+waffle&tab=wi

How do you make a plumber cry You kill it's family

- What do you call a black pirate? + A Nig-ARRRRRRRRRR - No, a pirate you fucking racist

a black guy, mexican guy, and asian guy race to hop over a window. Who was the LAST one to hop it? the mexican because he had to clean it first.

Q: How do you get a giraffe into a refrigerator? A: You open the door put the giraffe in and the close the door. Q: How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? A: You open the door to the refrigerator take the giraffe out then put the elephant in and close the door. Q: The Lion King is hosting an animal conference, all the animals attend but one, which one is it? A: The elephant it's in the fridge Q: You have to cross a river that is inhabited by crocodiles how do you cross it? A: You swim across, the crocodiles are at the animal conference.

Roses are red And heres something new Violets are violet They're not friggin blue

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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