You're as useful as Baby P's dummy.

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How many women does it take to arrange my new Ethan Allen furniture? Just one, I was told it was divorce present. She took it with her.

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1.Why were the black men asked to leave the bar? Because it was a womens bar. 2.Why did the 40 year old get an erection? Because he was excited.

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Do cows get breast cancer or utter cancer?

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What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

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What do you call a man named Cornelius? Well, he prefers to go by his middle name, Eric, because he was teased as a child for being named Cornelius.

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Why did the boy eat his homework? Because he was hungry. The teacher would stupid to say it was a piece of cake

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Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No it's Supe- oh wait it is a plane

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Three guys walk into a bar: a Priest, a rapist, and a pedophile...and two other guys

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what is the worst thing a priest could do to a little boy? brutally murder him

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a dyslexic made a dessert. it was a bit dry.

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Knock, knock. Who is there? Child services, here to take your children. The following day, there is another knock at the door. Who is there? The police. The woman runs into the kitchen and kills herself.

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Kindly ask him to come down.

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One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck. The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car. He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle. Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires. The blonde got angry and called the cops, who proceeded to come and arrest him.

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24

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why did the man commit scuicide because he was depressed

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What's worse than taking a bite in an apple and finding a worm in it? Taking a bite and finding half a worm.

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You know what they say about a man with big feet! They say it's indicative of the size of his penis, although there's no scientific evidence backing this up.

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what would happen if you took all the veins out of your body and laid them out tip to tip? you die

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what do Russians play? Tetris, what else?

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? There are numerous things worse than finding a worm in your apple. Some include the holocaust and nuclear warfare

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A Jewish man answered his phone one day. The man on the line said he'd kill him and all his family. The Jewish man then hung up the phone and resumed his everyday life.

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Knock, Knock... Whose there? panther panther who? panth-er no panths im goin' swimmin'

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What's more fun that being raped? Not being raped.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops