How do you kill a blond? Shoot her in the face.

yo mama is so fat she has more body mass than a skinny person

I'm not saying your mom's ugly, but I like pancakes.

Q: How many Jews can u fit in a bathtub? A: Well it depends if you use their ashes.

How did the man die? A gorilla raped him

What happened to the homeless guy when a woman gave him five dollars? He shot the woman because he is mentally retarded.

The indistinguishable bug corrupts a bond arrow.

So a woman goes to the doctor for an ultra-sound. The doctor says I have good news. The woman inquisitively replies what is it doctor, the doctor replies ; Your baby is Dead.

A. Ask me if I am a tree B. Are you a tree? A. No idiot

Why did the little girl fall off of the swings? She had no arms... Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs... Why didn't anyone help her up? She had no friends... Why did she die? She landed in a puddle...

Your mother is so fat she sometimes eats a normal sized portion of food and does not feel satisfied

What do you call a black man a asian man and a mexican man? 3 people

Two peanuts walk down the street. One was a salted.

Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? Because he's dead.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Why are VIOLETS blue?

A man walks into a bar

So this Horse walked into a bar... Just kidding, it was Sarah Jessica Parker.

Knock Knock! Whos there? Doctor! Doctor who? exactly.. how did you know?

Teacher: Why didn't you do your homework? Student: My friends told me not to. Teacher: So if your friends tell you to go jump off a bridge, would you do it? Student: Well, it all depends on if I land on a fat kid. Like Chubb. Chubb: Yeah, I know, my eating habit, i-i-its a big problem. -Payden R.

what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Christmas presents.

What do you call someone who can legally murder? OJ Simpson

Oh, well if you want, I would like for you to tell her that I wish her good health, suddenly it sounds like I am speaking with spider man here, so you could balance on the top of a tower like a ninja and stuff?

Jimmy can't drive the tractor. Why can't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he's a patato

Knock knock Who's there Fookie Fookie Who? Fook you too

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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