An asian woman was driving along the freeway one day when a police officer pulled her over and arrested her, The officer arrested her because she had killed her husband 5 years ago and she thought she had gotten away with it.

How did the blonde trip the brunette? She stuck out her foot

What did the man who brutally raped and murdered his infant daughter say? He didn't.

What did the penguin do in the desert? Die.

What's worse than having no coffee at the office? Looking out the window on the 100th floor and seeing the cockpit of a Boeing 767.

How do you tell identical twins apart? You can't. They look identical.

It's not just a boulder. It's a rock! A rooooocckk!

Why do we oftenly see african cry for nothing? Because this is the only way they get water.

How do you eat a candy cane? Shove it in your mouth and chew.

Roses are Red grass is greener every time i think of you i touch my weiner

Whats blue, green and red, and runs trough the strees each sunday? ...What? I have no idea, I was hoping you did.

What's the difference between a man and a woman? The latter has two additional letters added to the beginning.

Q. why did the skeleton crosse the rood. A. he didin`t becas he had no guts

What did the Catholic Priest say to the Altar Boy shortly after sex? Nothing. The feelings of shame and revulsion the priest felt about what he had just done meant he couldn't look him in the eye let alone talk to him.

knock knock! whos there? me! me who? thats right! whats right? meehoo! thats what i want to know! whats what you want to know? me who? yes, exactly! exactly what? yes, i have an exactlywatt on a chain! exactly what on a chain? yes! yes what? no, exactlywatt! thats what i want to know! i told you--exactlywatt! exactly what? yes! yes what? yes, its with me! whats with you? exactlywatt--thats whats with me! me who? yes! Go away! knock knock.....

An Asian, white, and a black man decide to play Russian Roulette. The Asian goes first and shoots himself in the head. The white man picks up the gun for his turn. The black man runs down the street screaming. Cops see him and the white man holding the gun, both are sent to jail for life for the murder of their friend.

Q. What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A. One's a scum-sucking bottom feeder, and the other's a highly trained professional skilled in the art of litigation.

when life gives you lemons you make lemonade when life gives you a homisidle brige you clearly have done something to make life angery

your momma is so fat that she should be worried about her higher risk of heart disease, diabetes, and ugliness.

What is worse than tripping over a stone, and falling face first into a dog shit, Not much..

XD I literally cant stop laughing XD, thats like a manly tussle would go down huh? XDXDXD Cartoon Network? Is that thing still on anywhere? You like watching cartoons? I don't mind if you do.

Horse with a chair on his head.

What happened to the boy who ate a piece of his Halloween candy? He died. It was laced with cyanide.

Why did the fish fly It didn't

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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