You're mama's so stupid, she decided to go back to school and finish her degree in Russian Literature to improve her self-esteem and maybe -- just maybe -- save her marriage, which had been on the rocks, mostly due to her intolerable self-loathing.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

...The new series of spinoff movies from the worlds most frightening franchise! Pretty Normal Activity: Doing the groceries *****-Did not scare me at all :D! Ballbusters movie rentals *****- The demon never showed up which made this the scariest movie ever! Could not sleep for months... Whatyumean there is nothing paranormal in this? Aww FU*beep*CK!! Sumgay Inthestreet Journal *****-Pissed myself just from hearing the title got a stroke and almost died!, was it another Paranormal movie you said? Most overhyped comment we could find. Goddamn exaggerated movie reviews that fooled me into buying the original and expect something actually scary :(

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why couldn't kitty drink it's milk?\ It's face was nailed to the floor

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A man builds a time machine but can only travel back in time. Where does he go? Irrelevant. Time and space exist on different planes.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what did the ox say to his son when he left for collage? bison

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: What goes up but doesn't come down? A: Columbia

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Mommy mommy I don't want to see grandma. Shut up and keep digging.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Stacey has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Stacey.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why are you gay? Because ***** you

thumb_up thumb_down +18

penis

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Whats bigger than 'burger king'? A. burger

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did the elephant say to the zebra? Nothing, elephants can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why are ginger's jokes not funny? Because they're gingers.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

black people

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Three men stumble upon an ancient lamp in the desert. They sell it to a museum and split the profits evenly.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

wenis

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q:what did the 14 year old girl from Tennessee say to her dad when she lost her virginity? A: Get off of me

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A plane crashed in the border of mexico and USA. Where do you bury the survivors? tell me in the thing bellow

thumb_up thumb_down +18

women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you call a dog with no legs? Don't matter what you call him he ain't gonna come.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What happened while Thomas crossed the street? He got hit by a truck. What happened to Billy? He was Thomas's Siamese twin, and he too met the same fate.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

identical jokes get different votes.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops