A woman gets into the front seat of a car and starts driving.

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What goes in dry and comes out wet Gum

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Why couldn't the boy watch the DVD about pirates? Because his mother did not understand the importance of putting the disc back in it's case after use, and as a result, has become too damaged for the DVD Player to play.

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There was a blonde, a redhead, and a brunette on an island. This island is called England, and this situation tends to happen a lot.

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What do you call two lesbians in a canoe? Women.

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What did one dead baby say to another dead baby? Nothing... they were dead.

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What do an owl and a squirrel have in common? They can both fly! Except for the squirrel.

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Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because the Nazis were on the brink of losing the war and Berlin was shortly to be captured by Soviet forces.

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Why does 1+1=2? Dunno, e-mail me if you do.

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What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

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What's worse then ten dead babies in a barrel? The one at the bottom is still alive.

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What did the angry man with tourette syndrome say when he smashed his thumb with a hammer? Ouch.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Me Me, who? -You -You? but I thought you were me. - I am you, you're looking in the mirror, asshole. - No, sir i'm sorry you have the wrong house. Asshole doesn't live here.

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What did batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are yellow Azeleas are pinkish purple

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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What do you call a dragon with no wings? a dragon with no wings :(

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What happens when you throw a blue rock into red water? It gets wet...

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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I like that, yet I wonder if our subconscious knows what it is what we seek, maybe we need to tell ourselves that we will find happiness, and then the mind leads us there.

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How did Jimmy know that his neighbor was a serial killer? He didn't... Jimmy's dead now

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

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A blonde was very smart, and nobody made fun of her when she sometimes made small mistakes like every other person regardless of hair color.

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Yo momma is so fat that she is overweight

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops