A chicken crosses the road... Gets fined for jaywalking.

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Dog is walking through a park and is almost stepped on by a horse. Dog says, "Hey, watch where you're going!" Horse says, "Well, looky here! A talking dog!"

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no

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A month after the nuclear bombing of Hiroshima, a typhoon hit the city killing another 2,000 people.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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what do you call 2 walking Arabs with long beards? pedestrians.

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I love bacon therefor I love people who eat bacon execpt people who eat my bacon then I hate people who eat bacon

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Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? Because he's dead.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Why are VIOLETS blue?

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Oh, well if you want, I would like for you to tell her that I wish her good health, suddenly it sounds like I am speaking with spider man here, so you could balance on the top of a tower like a ninja and stuff?

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Christmas presents.

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How do you kill a blond? Shoot her in the face.

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I was watching this movie..... its over now.

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A man walks into a bar

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Knock knock Who's there Fookie Fookie Who? Fook you too

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Two peanuts walk down the street. One was a salted.

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yo mama is so fat she has more body mass than a skinny person

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How did the man die? A gorilla raped him

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A black guy walks out of a house with a t.v. He proceeds to put it into a moving van and moves into his new house.

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Q: How many Jews can u fit in a bathtub? A: Well it depends if you use their ashes.

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"Hey, do you guys wanna hear a joke?!" -no, shut up.

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Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops.

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Your mother is so fat she sometimes eats a normal sized portion of food and does not feel satisfied

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A. Ask me if I am a tree B. Are you a tree? A. No idiot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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