Do you know what the zombie said? Raaargh Brains

Obesity runs in your family. To bad no one runs in your family.

why was Lucy fat? Her BMI was over the recommended average.

Yo mamma is so skinny, she has developed anorexia, a serious eating disorder, which not only affects her, but also the ones that she loves and cares about.

What smells like smoke, sounds like a pig, and looks like a horse? My mom's boyfriend

Why are objects in your mirror closer than they appear? Because they are closer than they appear.

What did the orphan kids get for Christmas? Cancer.

So, I was walking down the street. As i walked past a oak door an entrance to a mental institution, I heard a bored voice going, "eleven, eleven, eleven". My curiosity, like a cat, got better of me and I decided to take a peek through the key hole and see the eleven things being counted. As soon as I had my eye on the key hole, I was poked in the eye by a metal rod. Startled, I feel back to the street. And, sure enough, heard the same bored voice, going, "twelve, twelve, twelve".

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You just died, and I'm laughing at you and your extremely ugly face.

Why did the woman have no boobs? Breast cancer

pull my finger (farts)

Knock Knock! Who's There? Billy Sup Billy, come on in!

Did you hear phonsi was Gay? I just found out too, he walked into the diner and said, "ive got AAIIIIIDS."

haha your power hose was robbed and the shitty bike

cccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccorn

What happens when a man goes to college? He gets a degree and graduates most of the time or he fails miserably.

Wheres my hood? Behind your neck.

why aren't black people real? they are. just because they are less visible at night makes no difference.

what happend when 3 white guys and 3 black guys try out for a basketball team? They all made it because you need 5 people on the team and it is good to have an extra person on the team in case some one gets hurt, fouled out, late for the game or dies.

What's faster than a black man carrying your TV? The law enforcement that promptly catches him and is about to charges him with theft regardless of his ethnicity because stealing someone else's property is just generally an unlawful thing to do.

What did the mexican say to the black person? Hey there! How are you today?

Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasnt due to the fact that numbers have no feeling.

Q: What do you call black guys running down a hill? A: Black guys running down a hill.

A man was walking down the street in the pitch black dark and he looked into a pitch black dark window. What did he see? Pitch black dark people.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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