Q:Whats Brown and sticky? A:Maple Syrup

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Why did the man walk instead of taking the bus? Because he felt like getting a heathy workout.

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what didn't Jon go to the movies? He tripped and broke his neck and cant look up

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I man was taking a major shiit He forgot to wipe

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Why was the blonde staring at a container of orange juice? She wanted to make sure that it did not contain any pulp.

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You're such a retard, you have to take special education, live with a mother that doesn't know what to do with you, not understand the real world, and have people look at you strangely for the rest of your life.

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What did the teapot say to the teacup? Nothing. Teapots and teacups are inanimate objects, therefore, cannot speak.

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Knock knock ? Who's there ? Ipe Ipe who ? You sick basterd !

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? The pig rolled in the mud!

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Oh NOES! She does worry about me! YOU MUST APOLOGIZE! Relax, the body has two sources of happy drugs, one is the sweet calm stuff I am really bad at, and the other comes with adrenaline and stuff, the name of which I do not remember, both are important, but yeah, I am a thrill seeker, and when I do not find them, I make a thrill out of whatever I got, whatever that means.

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Yo momma so fat she jumped up in the air and got stuck.

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hola said the chinese man

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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot.

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Why are the dinosaurs extinct? A meteor hit the Yucatan Peninsula and caused a blast that covered the earth and killed them all.

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why did the mexican beat your ass larry clark III because you live in a apartment with your mom and dad who are black your dad has a truck your mom recked her car

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What do you call a man sitting at the bar drinking alone? An alcoholic.

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Why did the blond paint in the nude? because she couldn't find her clothes, and wanted to express her emotions through art

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A man walks into a bar falls into the street and gets run over. It was very tragic

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A man watched his city burn. He was traumatized by the loss of his friends and family and went to therapy to recover.

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Do they have a fourth of July in England? Yes, but it is just a sad reminder to them that all the cool people left for America.

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What do kittens and napkins have in common? You can sneeze into both of them except the kitten doesn't like it

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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A bunch of nuns were riding a three-seat bicycle. The seats were comfy and no one complained.

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If monkeys ate trees, than what would trees be made out of? No one knows because that will never happen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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