Alan: My Grandfather was in the SS and has a leather jacket made jews he killed. Me: Really? Alan: No, i'm korean. My grandfather wouldnt be allowed into the SS.

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-Knock! Knock! -Who's there? -Bob. Is Brian's here? -Wrong adress. Brian's home is the first one at your right. -Oh sorry. Have a nice day.

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What do you call a Harry Beaver? A beaver with lots of hair.

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What are the similarites between Autistic people and dead people? They are both very poor in social situations

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What is big, long, hot, and firm? An erection due to the arousal of a woman's sex appeal.

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A princess kisses a frog to transform it into a prince.. She is soon arrested for committing bestiality

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A guy walked into a bar. He got drunk. He hit a small child with his Suburu and was charged with a DUI.

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Several ways to annoy people: Grab the end of their shirt to blow your nose Try to shove a bowling ball down there throat Try to sell them a broom and vacuum Try to eat their babies paint their toe Nibble their ankles Ask if you can babysit their crystal and if they say no start whining Carry around your chicken and ask if they want a nugget

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Why is Justin Bieber gay? Justin is attracted to the female gender

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Light travels faster than sound, thats why people look smart until they talk.

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A guy has spikey things in his butt, what happened?............... He fell on a cactus.

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Q: Why did Grandma fall down the stairs? A: Because she had a brain hammerage

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What happens when a building has a 13th floor ? You realize this isn't a del building and fall down 13 flights.

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why did the alien eat the cow? peer pressure

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What happens when 2 gay men rub their penises together Jello

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What's grey and can't fly? A castle

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Why was the drunk man arrested? he beat his wife and was sentenced too 3 months in federal prison

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You might be a redneck if you hate your father and you live in a trailer

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What do you get when you cross a lawn mower and a rabbit? A dead rabbit...

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Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar? Actually it's my cookie jar, and my cookies. I stole nothing.

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Knock Knock Who's There ........................ ........................................... I hate doorbell ditchers

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Three blind mice. See how they run. Into things.

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The saying "When Pigs Fly" Can easily be canceled. Just tie a rocket and wings to it and let it go.

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What is your bill about? Clinton

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops