How do you tell a bunch of Chinese people apart? Go up to each one and ask them their first and last names. The chances of any of them being the same is quite slim, giving each person their own identity.

What do you say to a dead man who knocks on your door? Nothing, you shoot him cause he's a zombie

How do you kill Chuck Norris? Shoot him in the face.

What's green and has wheels? A frog in a wheelchair

Wanna know way i don't eat grapes? I hate Grapes.

How did the mouse die It was eaten by a cat How did the cat die It jumped into the bathtub and drowned

How did the baby survive the car accident? He didn't. He was killed on impact.

A white man walks into a bar. He stabs 4 people and 1 escapes with extremem blood hemorages. his fanily later finds him bleeding on their family car. They take him to the hospital where he is put on life support. Later that night they are told there is nothing the doctors can do and the man slips away in his sleep. Who is to blame? The black guy in prison.

So a guy goes to his doctor because he thinks he has an STD. He asks the doctor "how bad is it doc?" to which the doctor replies "Well, I got the test results and it doesn't look good. You've got chlamydia, gonorrhea, and onomatopoeia. The guy asks "What's onomatopoeia?" The doctor replies "It's exactly what it sounds like"

Whats more annoying than listening to another arrow in the knee joke? bink2w32.dll is missing from your computer.

what happen to the popo who got arrested? he told himself that he had the right to remain silent

A criminal walks into a bar, and shoots the bartender and has his way with the waitress. Its his bar now.

This is one LONG empty space isn't it?

What's worse than a dead baby falling out of a tree? Two dead babies stapled together falling out of a tree.

Why was the black man crying? His wife left him, took his children, and most of his possessions in the divorce.

A vegetarian walked into a butcher Luckily he realized where he was and walked out!

if a sentence contains the words "Chuck Norris" it still has to end up with a period otherwise it is bad grammar and is looked down upon by American society.

A chicken walks into a bar and orders a beer. Just kidding chickens cant talk and animal control was called

Robert Mugabe.

what does hi = good by cause person doesn't like you.

There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realizing the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? I ASKED YOU FIRST!

Two chemists walk into a bar. The first one says "I'll have some H20." The second one says "why did you come to the bar if you're just going to have water?" and orders a beer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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