Why did the boy die? He got hit by the school bus.

Where does Elmo live? In Sesame Street.

What did the ice cream man ask the little boy? Want some ice cream?

Q. Why did the woman cross the road? A. Who cares, what was she doing out of the kitchen

Why was the little boy sad Because he has depression from his father beating him over and over every time he comes home from school...

what happened to the fat lady she went on a diet and is now skinny but she cant resist mcdonalds big macs so she quickly become fat

Q. Why is Obama stupid? A. That's an opinion, therefore i cannot answer that.

Q: What did the pedestrian say to the bus driver that hit him? A: Nothing, he died.

What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? My ass

What did my uncle get for Christmas? Me... MagicMonkey

My dog has no nose, how does it smell? Using its anus.

How do you trick the devil? You give him a ginger.

So there were three guys on a plane. they all died.

I heard that the Boston marathon was a BLAST!

Q: What did the bus driver say to the black man? A: Nothing, he simply greeted him with a nod, as he would do to any other person who chose to ride the bus.

Where do bees go to the bathroom? In the hive - they're incontinent.

How many times have I said the word shingles? twelve.

Hey man how was the trip to Hiroshima? Great it blew my mind!! And how was Nagasaki ? It was the bomb!!

why did the chicken cross the road? i don't know u tell me

Why did the chicken fall down? Because it wanted to have fun

Why was the boy sad? I don't know, what do think I am? An umbrella? Why would you even think FOR A MOMENT that it's OK to just ASK me random stuff? Do you have ANY IDEA who I am?! I'm your worst nightmare, and if you ever ask me ANYTHING without permission again, or so help me I will drown the nearest pet goldfish. P.S. His cat died.

Q: What happens when two planes both crush a tower in New York City? A: Bad news.

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What did the man say when an pterodactyl flew into the kitchen while he was having breakfast? Huh, that's strange.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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